I agree whole heartily with Dr. Cloud’s blog below. Mother’s Day and Father’s Day can be difficult when wounds from the past have not been healed. The bible tells us to honor our Mother’s and our Father’s. Sometimes this has to be done by choice because the feelings are not there. We can choose to honor their role and depend on our Heavenly Father to heal and redeem past relationships.
It is Mother’s Day and I know that for some of you this is a great day of celebration, and for others, a difficult day. If it was difficult, remember that if it is because you have a difficult mother, or had one, that does not mean that all is lost.
“Mothering” is something that we can always get, no matter what our age, from good community. Nurturing, bonding, support, freedom for your boundaries, instruction, modeling, correction, validation, forgiveness, encouragement, and all of the other things that mothers provide are readily available in good support systems, and they can really help if you missed it the first time around.
But for that to happen, you have to do a couple of things.
First, admit that you missed some things the first time around. That is not to villianize your mother, but to just say what is true and open yourself up to what you need.
Second, you have to find a safe community and begin to open up and express what you need.
Third, you have to grieve and let go of what you cannot have from your real mother, instead of remaining in a place of needing what she can never provide.
Fourth, forgive her and accept her for who she really is.
Fifth, move forward with your community and let them push you to the growth that your own mother could not. From there, GO FOR LIFE!
(if you want to read more about this, check out our book “The Mom Factor”)
(taken from face book)
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